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Welcome To
Bizarre Police Chronicles
Premiere Issue
April,6,2000
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I hope you find this issue interesting and entertaining!
Index:
Bizarre excuses people give when caught in the act!
A really strange and bizarre 911 call!
Judge laughs defendant to jail!
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Bizarre Excuses People Give When Caught In The Act!
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File No.1
Police arrested a man in a mall inside an electronics store about
two hours after the store had closed. The man claimed he was in
the restroom and didn't know the store was closing. When he came
out of the restroom, the doors were locked and nobody was around
to let him out. Well, this genius couldn't come up with another
excuse when he was told that the restroom facilities were located
outside the store in the malls food court area. Police found that
the lock on the back door of the store had been broken and the
man's pick-up truck was parked behind the store with over $5000
worth of electronic equipment belonging to the store.
File No.2
But officer, I was speeding because I just bought new shoes and I
applied the same pressure on the accelerator as I did with my old
shoes and since my new shoes are heavier and not broke-in yet, I
didn't realize I was going any faster. How can you hold me
responsible? So I know you can give me a brake. The speeder was
the one that needed to give a brake, she was going 75 in a 45. Our
heavy-footed speeder couldn't get out of this one and ended up
paying a hefty fine. I wonder if she ever got those shoes broke-
in!
File No.3
Police stopped a man when he was sited weaving on and off the
road and driving at erratic speed. The man claimed that his dog
was doing the driving. Asked how his dog could have been driving
the car, the man stated that he was sleepy and pulled over to
the side of the road to take a nap. He said that he left the car
running to keep warm. Somehow, the man explained,his dog must
have kicked the car into drive and took off down the street. By
the time the man woke up, he realized his car was moving and he
saw his dog pushing at the steering wheel. This man claimed
that by the time he could get the car stopped, the dog jumped out
and then the police arrived.
What police wanted to know was how the dog opened the door to
jump out--All the windows were rolled up.
Our dog-lover was tested and arrested for DWI. His license was
suspened, so his dog must be doing most of the driving now!
Lets hope the dog doesn't get arrested by the K-9 corp.
File No.4
A driver was arrested after police stopped him for a minor
vehicle violation. While talking to the driver, the officer
noticed a gun in the floor on the passenger side. When police
completed a search of the car they found 3 guns, a large quantity
of cocaine and a sack with several thousand dollars.
Instead of admitting to the possession, this man of wisdom
decided to convince police that he was only out for a joy ride.
He tried to convince police that he didn't know who the car
belonged too. He said he was walking around in a parking lot of
a local grocery store and happen to see the keys in the ignition
and decided to take the car for a joy ride around the block.
When originally approached about the minor vehicle violation, this
man claimed he had left his wallet at home. Thinking in advance,
he gave police a phony name and address to perhaps go along with
his phony story about stealing the car for a joy ride.
When police ran a license plate check, it came back as being
owned by a William ---. Our man claimed his name was Robert ---.
However, the man's story fell completely apart when the arresting
officer checked the ticket he had originally presented to this man
for a tail light being burned out and discovered that the man had
signed the name William ---, the name DMV indicated as being the
owner of the car.
Isn't it amazing what efforts some criminals will go to in order
to convince others of their innocence. This man was caught and
had no chance of convincing anyone that his story was valid. Did
he actually believe police would arrest him for stealing the car
and not check-out the rest of the details. Criminals like this
one is why crime does not pay.
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A Strange And Bizarre 911 Call
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At 3:05 Am on a Monday morning a Florida 911 police dispatcher
received a call from a residence in an upper middle class area.
The caller kept repeating the words "come quick, he has a gun"-
"come quick he has a gun". Even though the dispatcher kept
asking the caller for more details and advised the caller to
get to a safe place, the caller kept repeating those same words
over and over. Not able to determine whether there was a hostage
situation, a burglary, or an attempt upon someone's life, police
were promptly dispatched to the callers residence. Four police
cars arrived within minutes.Seven officers surrounded the house
and demanded the occupants to come out with hands above their
heads. Within seconds, a husband and his wife, dressed in their
night clothes, came walking out the front door. Startled, con-
fused and sleepy eyed, they asked what was going on. Police
explained the call and checked out the house for a possible
intruder. When they approached the dining room, they found the
phone in the floor and close by, the family's pet parrot walking
circles around the phone. The wife explained that their
parrot had picked up the phrase "come quick, he has a gun" from
a movie they watched a few days before.
Evidently the phone had been knocked into the floor and the
programmed number for 911 had been pressed, either by the parrot
or as it bumped an object when it fell to the floor. How 911 was
activated will always remain a mystery, but this 911 call did
add some excitement to this usually peaceful neighborhood.
The family was later interviewed and indicated that their parrot
Trevor had been grounded. No more TV for him! At least for now!
I hear Trevor has taken up bird calling!
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Judge Laughs Defendant To Jail!
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A man, charged with drug possession, finally got his day in
court. He argued that police had no right to search him without
a warrant. However, police testified that a bulge in the
defendants jacket pocket could have been a gun and that gave
them the right to search. Well it so happened that the defendant
was wearing that same jacket in court. Eager to prove his case,
he turned the jacket over to the judge to demonstrate how a
bulge could not be detected as police had testified. As the judge
examined the jacket, he too noticed a bulge in the pocket and
questioned the defendant. The defendant, not remembering that he
had placed something in the jacket earlier, was unsure of what
the judge was about to pull out of the pocket. To the amazement
of everyone in the court room including the defendant and in
particular, the judge, the pocket contained a package of cocaine.
Unable to control his laughter, let alone the court room, this
judge had to call a recess in order to regain his composure and
to allow everyone else to calm down before order in the court
room could be restored. Even the defendant had to laugh, even if
for a moment. Of course he's not laughing much these days.
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Best Wishes,
Jerry Romans
Editor
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