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Welcome To
Bizarre Police Chronicles
Issue No. 5
May 4, 2000
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Hello once again and welcome to the 5th issue. I hope you enjoy
the interesting stories and special features of this edition.
Please feel free to e-mail copies of this newsletter to your
friends, relatives and associates. Let them also experience the
"Bizarre Police Chronicles."
Index:
One Way Street To The Big House!
Man Bulldozes Ex-Girlfriends Car!
Cops Take Lunch Break And Make Major Drug Bust!
The Bumper Caper!
Strange And Bizarre Laws!
Quick Stop Bandit Not So Quick!
Update On "Chronicles" New Web Site!
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One Way Street To The Big House!
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Two men escaped in a car after robbing a local convenience store.
Police were soon in pursuit, but had some difficulty catching up
with the high speeding suspects. However, they were able to keep
the suspects in sight. The chase lasted about 10 minutes and,
then suddenly, it was all over.
The suspects had turned down a one way street and crashed their
car into a set of gates on a dead end road. Bizarre as it may
seem, and very unfortunate for these wrong way dead end robbers,
they had crashed into the gate of the *state penitentiary*. The
two men were apprehended and later charged with armed robbery
and numerous other charges related to the chase and crash.
Each man is now serving a prison term in the very same state
penitentiary they crashed into.
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Man Bulldozes Ex-Girlfriends Car!
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A man,who literally and purposely demolished his ex-girlfriend's
car with a bulldozer, plea bargained through the court system to
pay his ex-girlfriend back for all damages.He owed over $10,000.
If paid according to terms, this man had effectively plea
bargained his way out of prison. The prosecuting attorney was
going for a 5 year sentence, but accepted the plea bargain since
this was the man's first offense and his ex-girlfriend was more
than willing to accept the terms of payment.
The man would be allowed to make monthly payments of $400 over a
period of about 27 months. He could also make larger payments at
any time and of course he could pay the entire debt off at any
time. He was given 5 working days to present the courts with the
first payment. On the fifth day he surprised the court officer,
assigned to his case, by making a payment for the total amount.
However, the following week he was arrested for presenting the
courts with a forged check against an account he did not own.
He is now serving 10 years instead of 5. How dumb!
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Cops Take Lunch Break And Make Major Drug Bust!
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A man, sitting in a restaurant, receives a call on his cell
phone. With little thought or concern about what other patrons
might hear, he repeats the details and pick-up point for an
illegal drug deal.
What this man did not know, was that in the booth behind him,
there were two police officers and a detective who worked in
the drug enforcement division. Since the deal was to go down
in 4 hours, the police had plenty of time to prepare for the
drug bust. As a result, drug enforcement officers were able to
bust 6 drug dealers including a major dealer that under cover
agents had been trying to capture for over 5 years.
The man who once talked on the cell phone, now does all his
talking in a cell!
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The Bumper Caper!
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A man from Texas attempted to remove the dock door from a
warehouse loaded with computers. He attached a chain to the
bumper of his station wagon and hooked the other end to the door
on the dock. With the accelerator pressed to the floor he
attempted to pull the door off it's hinges. When a loud alarm
sounded, the man drove off and was quickly some distance away
from the warehouse. With no one to witness his unsuccessful
attempt,he knew he was free and clear and so returned home. When
he arrived, the police were there waiting for him.
Once the police confirmed the man's name, he was placed under
arrest for the attempted break-in. How did police track this man
down so fast? Simple. In the unsuccessful attempt, the car's
bumper came off. When police responded to the alarm, they found
the bumper and chain attached to the dock door of the warehouse.
Also, attached to the bumper was the license plate for the man's
car. A quick check with the DMV revealed the owner's name and
address. In his haste, this man was not aware that his bumper
was gone and that it would actually be a bizarre piece of
evidence used against him in a court of law.
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Strange And Bizarre Laws!
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Some of these laws are still on the books, while others no
longer exist. In any case, I hope you find them amusing and
somewhat thought provoking.
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IN Massachusetts, you must pay a special license fee in order to
wear a goatee in public! If you don't pay the fee you could be
breaking the law.
Another Massachusetts law prohibits gorillas from riding or even
setting in the back seat of a car. I guess they don't want any
monkey business going on back there.
In Alexandria, Minnesota you better not make love to you wife if
you have bad breath. It is specifically against the law if your
breath smells like onions, garlic, or sardines.
If you bite someone in Louisiana with your natural teeth, you
can be charged with a simple assault. Try biting someone with
your false teeth and the charge is aggravated assault.
Restaurants in Connecticut are required to provide customers
with a nose-blowing and a non-nose-blowing section. I wonder if
the nose-blowing section gets special hankies. I can see a new
industry emerging. Some enterprising businessman could start
selling imprinted hankies with the restaurants logo. I'm
looking for partners now.
Here's a really bizarre state law in Pennsylvania. I sure hope
this law is no longer enforced. The law goes something like
this: If you are driving on a country road at night, you are
required by law to stop every mile. After stopping, you must
get out of your car and launch a rocket signal. You must then
wait 10 minutes until livestock have been cleared from the road.
I think I'll just walk.
Comic book lovers Beware! In Oklahoma, it's a violation to read
a comic book while driving. But, I guess it's alright to read
"War and Peace."
Another law from Oklahoma, that was recently repealed, required
you to tether your car if parked in front of a public building.
Apartment dwellers Beware! Especially men! In Switzerland, you
can get into serious trouble flushing your toilet after 10 P.M.
To add insult to injury, a man is not allowed to stand while
urinating after 10 P.M.
If you are a pedestrian trying to cross a highway at night in
Indiana, you are required by law to wear a tail light. Where
are you suppose to wear it and don't you think that wearing a
tail light might be dangerous. I know that I don't want some
tail-gater coming up on me, with the impression that I'm just
another car going a little slower than him, and then have him
discover, a moment to late, that you are a pedestrian and not
a car.
A national law in Australia requires taxi cabs to carry a bale
of hay in the trunk.
Many people use their garage as a catch-all storage facility.
In fact, many people don't even park their vehicles in their
garage. However, in Long Beach,California it is against the
law to have any item other than a car in your garage.
A fairly old law in Redlands, California prohibits a motor
vehicle from being driven on any city street unless a man with
a lantern walks ahead of the vehicle.
We all know that cattle rustling is illegal. But in Texas it is
also illegal if you milk a cow that belongs to someone else.
In Alabama, men are forbidden to spit in the presence of the
opposite sex. Also, a state law prohibits booger flicking in
the wind!
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Quick Stop Bandit Not So Quick!
-------------------------------
A man, trying to rob a service station, leaves his car engine
running so he can make a quick get-away. Unfortunately for him,
he locked his keys in the car. Within minutes after the robbery,
this Johnny be Quick was captured by police and arrested for
armed robbery.
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Update On "Chronicles" New Web Site!
------------------------------------
I had anticipated a grand opening, this week, for the "Bizarre
Police Chronicles" web site. However, my ISP has had some
technical problems which has prevented me from being able to
upload files.This was temporary and my staff is now back to
work on this project. We've already installed a chat room,
message board, a news feed, a quizlet and a polling booth. We
have some great features and surprises planned, so be looking
for the next update, and hopefully the Grand Opening
Announcement.
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Well,that's all for this issue. As always, I hope you enjoyed it
as much as I enjoyed bringing it to you. If You like my
newsletter, I invite you to recommend it to your friends,
relatives and associates. Feel free to e-mail copies to them, so
that they may also experience the "Bizarre Police Chronicles."
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Best Wishes,
Jerry Romans
Editor
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