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Welcome To
Bizarre Police Chronicles
Issue No. 9
June 1, 2000
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Hello once again to all my regular subscribers and welcome to
all new subscribers. This is the 9th issue. I hope you enjoy
the interesting stories and special features of this edition.
Please feel free to e-mail copies of this newsletter to your
friends, relatives, and associates. Let them also experience
the "Bizarre Police Chronicles."
Index:
A-Resting-Music!
Big Max To The Rescue!
90 MPH Not Fast Enough!
Robber Creates A Circus Of Events!
Strange And Bizarre Laws!
Really Dumb Criminal Acts Department!
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A-Resting-Music!
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A husband and wife returned home after a late party and
discovered that their patio door was open. In fact, the
lock on the handle was broken. They immediately called the
police.
While waiting for the police, the couple checked out the area
downstairs and could not find anything missing or vandalized.
When police did arrive, they were escorted upstairs. To
everyone's surprise, they found a man sleeping in the couple's
bed. He was wearing a set of ear phones connected to a stereo
system. Next to the bed was a large duffel bag filled with
compact disks, jewelry, cameras and other items this burglar
had planned on taking.
After his arrest, this man explained to detectives that he was
checking out the quality and sound of the stereo system to
decide if it was worth stealing. He tested the stereo's quality
by playing a compact disk of his favorite group. He got so
relaxed and involved in the music that he lost track of time and
even where he was. It was late and he became sleepy. When he
laid down on the bed he fell asleep. Apparently he had been
sleeping at least two hours before he was discovered.
After his arrest, he was linked to five other house break-ins
and was found guilty on all counts. He is now serving the first
of six prison terms. I guess you could say that this criminal
had to face the music!
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Big Max To The Rescue!
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A man was arrested for trying to steal a dog. The dog owner's
other dog was credited with the capture. The would be dog napper
admitted to trying to steal the dog from it's owner's fenced
back yard.
On his way out with the dog, the dog napper was met and cornered
by the dog owner's other dog named Max. Max, a 200+ pound
Mastiff was always protective of his smaller companion, a toy
poodle named Maxine. When the owner of the dogs returned home
from work, he discovered the would be dog napper on top of his
storage shed with Max and Maxine patiently waiting at ground
level for their captive to come down.
When the dog owner asked the man what he was doing on the roof
of the storage shed, the man was more than willing to admit his
attempt to steal Maxine. It was 4:30 PM and the man had been on
the roof since around 9:30 AM that morning. Seven and half hours
of looking down at Max was enough for him.
He explained to police that he had spotted Maxine being walked
several days before his attempted dog napping. He watched the
owner put her in the fenced back yard, but was not aware of "Big
Max." He told police that he had planned on buying a toy poodle
for his daughter, but that they were too expensive. So he had
decided to steal Maxine to give to his daughter. However, as
this man soon found out, Max was not about to let his girl be
dog napped. It just took one look at Max and one growl to secure
her release and safety. In a matter of seconds Maxine was safe
on the ground and the would be napper was hopefully safe on
the roof of the storage shed. It turned out that the storage
shed had actually been converted into a dog house for Max and
Maxine.
The man was arrested, given a fine, and ended up providing 40
hours of court ordered community service. I think they should
have made him work at the dog pound!
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90 MPH Not Fast Enough!
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A man in Georgia received a speeding ticket for going 90 MPH in
a 25 Mph speed zone. His appearance in court was somewhat
amusing! The excuse he gave to the judge was that he had taken a
laxative and was in urgent need to make it home before mother
nature made her speedy relief. He still had to pay the ticket.
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Robber Creates A Circus Of Events!
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A man robbed a convenience store in a small Colorado town. He
left his car engine running so he could make a quick get-away!
When he rushed out of the store to get into his car, it was gone.
Yes! It had been stolen. He then hijacked a car, at gun point,
from a man who was going into the store. As the robber pulled
out of the store's parking lot, another car slammed into the side
of the hijacked car he was driving. What's really bizarre? The
car that hit him was his own car. The same one that was suppose
to be his get-away car. Just moments before the robber left the
store, two teenage boys took it for a joy ride. Once around
the block they got scared and decided to return the car to the
convenience store. That's when they crashed into the hijacked
car being driven by the robber.
The story gets even more bizarre! The man whose car was hijacked
turned out to be the police chief of this small Colorado town.
After the crash, he arrested the robber and the two teenage boys.
No one was injured. Everything happened so fast. After the police
chief was hijacked, he called for help and four police cars
responded immediately. The whole circus of events lasted just a
matter of four or five minutes!
The teenage boys received probation. The robber was charged with
armed robbery and hijacking the police chief's car. He is now
serving a long prison term.
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Strange And Bizarre Laws!
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Some of these laws are still actually on the books, while others
no longer exist. In any case, I hope you find them amusing and
somewhat thought provoking.
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In Idaho it's against the law to fish while on a giraffe's back.
At one time, Louisiana lawmakers must have thought that all
women were potentially bad drivers. They passed a law making it
mandatory for a husband to wave a flag in front of any car being
driven by his wife. If lawmakers thought women were dangerous
drivers, what were they thinking when they required the husband
to stand in front of the car and wave a flag.
In Maryland, clotheslines are forbidden, but you are allowed to
hang your clothes on a fence.
In North Carolina you are required to pay a property tax on your
dog. Maybe I'll consult with "Big Max" and see what he has to
say about that!
Grocery stores in Indiana are forbidden from selling cold
liquor and liquor stores can not sell cold soft drinks.
In Montana, sheep placed in the cab of a truck must be
accompanied by a chaperone.
In Ohio, you are required to buy a hunting license to catch
mice.
An outdated law in Ohio forbids lawmen from arresting anyone
on a Sunday or on the Fourth of July.
In Alaska, it is illegal to push a live moose from a moving
airplane.
I've heard of grass catchers on lawn mowers. But, a law in New
Hampshire requires you to outfit your cattle with a feces
catching device. The law is only in effect when your cattle
crosses state roads.
In Kansas it is illegal to catch catfish with your bare hands.
A law that still exist in Nevada makes it legal to hang someone
if they shoot your dog on your property. "Big Max" says he
rather take the law into his own paws. He has a better idea on
how to take care of those varmints.
Women Beware! In Kentucky, a woman must have her husband's
permission to buy a hat.
In Maine, it is illegal to step out of an airplane while in
flight. Maine may have some problems with prosecuting the
violators.
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Really Dumb Criminal Acts Department!
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The following three stories are from our "Really Dumb Criminal
Acts Department." Hope you enjoy them!
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File No. 1
A man robbed a local grocery store in a suburb of Chicago, Ill.
Witnesses told police that the suspect escaped in a car that
displayed a for sale sign. The robbers name, address and phone
number were also displayed. Soon after the robbery the suspect
was on display in front of witnesses who identified him from
a line-up.
File No. 2
A man in Texas tried to rob a gun shop. He announced his intent
while holding a pocket knife in his hand. He proceeded to go
behind the counter toward the cash register. When the clerk
refused to open the cash drawer, the robber moved aggressively
toward the clerk. The clerk then retrieved a large caliber
handgun and fired one shot, wounding the robber.
911 was called. An ambulance and the police arrived shortly
thereafter. The robber survived the gun shot to his leg, but was
hospitalized for almost a month.
Although out armed, the pocket knife was considered a deadly
weapon. This mental giant was charged with attempting an
armed robbery and attempt to do bodily harm with a deadly weapon.
File No. 3
Two men robbed a KFC, but were quickly apprehended when they ran
into the waiting arms of the police. These brain deprived
robbers had parked their get-away car at the police station next
to the KFC. Not only that, they parked their car in a reserved
for police parking space.
The KFC manager called the police the moment the robbers left the
store. Two policemen were already standing by the get-away car,
ready to make arrangements to have it towed. Two other officers
in a police car were already on their way to the KFC. The
robbers were easily spotted running toward their car. The
policemen in the parking lot and the officers in the police car
had these brilliant criminals in custody halfway between the KFC
and the police station.
They were booked and charged with armed robbery and then later
convicted and sentenced to prison terms.
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Best Wishes,
Jerry Romans
Editor
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